Huge increase.

So I have this weird student. He never seems like he wants to be there. He dozes off, text messages and spends the rest of the time looking out the window. So I was kind of messing with him one day, I can't remember all the details, but we ended up talking about girl problems. I guess when he was 14 he was talking to a girl he liked and one of his friends came by and said "ohhh, is that the girl you like?" Since then he hasn't been able to talk to a girl (he's in uni now).

So being the creative and caring teacher I am, I played the part of the girl. His job was to try and talk to me. Since he is afraid to talk, I told him to just end everything with a question. He kept forgetting so I had this big question mark on a piece of paper that I would hold up. And before you even start, yes, I know I am the last guy on Earth to be giving advice on how to speak with girls. But teaching someone how to order Hawaiian pizza gets old after about...1 time. Our conversation went something like this:

Him: Hi.
Me: Hello.
H. Do you like math?
Me. No, I like art.
H. I don't.
Me. (holding the ? sign)

Me. (as the teacher again, telling him he just messed up.)

Take 2

H. Hi.
Me. Hello.
H. Do you like (some J TV show).
Me. What's that?
H. A tv show.
Me. I've never seen it. What's it about?
H. It's about robots.
Me. (reminding him about the ?'s and telling him to never talk about robots with a girl)

Our staff is made up of a bunch of young J girls so I gave him some lines on a piece of paper to say as he left. "Hello, how's it going?" and "I like your haircut." I was standing behind the staff as he checked out frantically jumping up and down and waving my hands in that sort of encouraging type of way. He didn't even make eye contact with her. I failed.


And from a different lesson:

So let's say we are telling stories. I give my students a couple seconds to brainstorm and think up a true story. Of course they never have any. I always do the story lessons because then I don't have to talk. When they can't think of a story I have to assign them one. Then I get to hear funny quotes like:

-you have to train your bunny.
-maybe she just touched the bunny somewhere the bunny didn't want her to.


And from yesterday, a guy was reading to me from his book.

Him. ....this will result in a hug increase.
Me. What?
Him. I don't get it.
Me. What? A hug increase. Read it again.
Him. (reading it again, the same.
Me (laughing at him)

No hablo espanol

I just bought a ticket - Mpls to Guatemala. $287. May 2nd. The only problem will be leaving at 6am. I of course will have to arrive early. Which means I might be asking someone with nothing to do for a ride at a very odd hour. It's at moments like this that I am glad I have such loving and caring friends back in MN!

hahaha

What's that fuss?

This one just amazed me.

Dude: People in America all ride the train.
15ish yr old girl: No they don't, some ride buses. Don't you know Rosa Parks?


I wonder where he got the train idea from. I would have thought SUVs or something. Funny.

Mountains

So this is what it is and what I will have to do. There are 3 parts of this I will have to go through. But first, the vocab.

Prosthetic technician. They make limbs. Thats all (I think). No patients, white coats or liability. For this I will need a two year tech degree. I am counting on this being fun, interesting and not too hard.

Prosthetist. These are the guys that boss around the technicians. They also deal with the patients (sizing, fitting, adjusting etc.). And they can also make limbs too (no surgery). Getting this position will take a little more work.

There are a couple other positions but all the language and education paths just confused me, but those seem to be the main two.

To be a prosthetist I will first have to do the 2 yr tech degree followed by a 1 year residency. Then I will have to do another 2 yr program for the prosthetist part with a 1 yr residency again. So one could start and finish their residency in six years (well add a few more because a 4yr deg is req). The part that will complicate everything is that to get accepted into the second program I will have to first complete the following

Biology Minimum 3 semester hours
Chemistry Minimum 3 semester hours
Physics Minimum 3 semester hours
Psychology Minimum 3 semester hours
Algebra or higher Math Minimum 3 semester hours
Human Anatomy and Physiology (with Lab) Minimum 6 semester hours


So far I have 1 semester of bio and a 4 yr degree...and the math I guess. I think a very motivated person could mix a lot science classes into the first 3 yrs. I think if I do choose this path I will end up taking 20 credits for the first 2 years - the reg 15 for the tech plus 1 science class each sem - then a load of science in the summer. This decision would of course depend on the difficulty of the tech degree but for some reason I'm not too worried about it. I am not even sure what 3 semester hours means. Someone told me it equals 2 semesters. The other thing I will have to find out, prolly by talking to someone in person, is what admissions is like into the last part. It says a "C" or better is required in all of the classes. Does that mean you get in then? Geez, I could take 25 credits a semester then! haha

Well I am getting way ahead of myself. Well, now you all know the strange things that have been running through my head for the last two weeks. Also I am trying to find the cheapest ticket home, a ticket to Cent Am., figure out when to leave and what to do when my fam is here for 2 weeks.

Also, Jordan, I had this really witty comment typed up about the STD song and then I hit enter and my internet disconnected!!!!!!!!!!

And FYI I live on the side of a mountain. Tonight I ran up to this temple. 480 steps. Started off with street lights and then turned into lanterns! The last couple of times I tried and failed - these pics are from a few months ago. It's a nice night trip. I counted the steps on the way down cause I'm a nerd.

phase 1

I want to be a prosthetist. I think it is feasible...except I will finish up with it when I am in my early 30's. As sad as it may seem, it is the first time I've wanted to be something since I was like 6. Well, I've always wanted to be "something," I just never knew what that was. It's annoying because anytime I make some important life decision it's always one that I could just have easily made five years earlier had my head been screwed on a little tighter (or is it straighter?).

Anyway, I am really anxious to do some job shadowing. Hopefully this isn't just a phase if it is my life will be back to directionless.

My plans to live in Central America have not changed...well except for the part where I job shadow down there. yeah, that will be cool. I'm excited.