Finally

Pulled off my first twister today - from the bottom. It's a spine lock that I have been sporadically trying to do for a few months now. I just wish it was legal.
Yes!

U of MN journalism at its finest

I didn't read the article. But the headline says it all: Report finds bar air cleaner since ban. Does the study conclude that a closed room with a bunch of people smoking in it will have air that is dirtier than that of a room without smokers? I don't know. Why don't you read it and find out.

Does smoking actually clean up the air? Is it good for your lungs? I don't know. Like I said, I didn't read the article.

Kung Fu, babes and cages. Japan - where it's all at.

Events from a couple days ago.

My boy Nobuki. He is really low level and tries really hard. He reminds me of..from HS Dan Olson...from UMD M Hill...from the U...No one, sorry, I hung out with normal people. Anyway, he whipped out his comic books. I was thinking - oh man, 40 min of him telling me about some J Kung Fu story. Anyway, at some point he either thought I asked "do you know Kung Fu?" or he asked if I wanted a demonstration while I was carelessly nodding my head up and down like I knew what he was talking about. Either way, out of nowhere, he got up, checked the door to make sure no one was looking, and then went into Kung Fu mode. He was doing all these crazy chops, grunts, stomps etc. It was great. I wish I had a picture. I was trying not to laugh because he was so serious about it. But I couldn't help it.

A different lesson, same day.
Again, doing the doc/patient lesson.
Ending the class with "so, have you ever been to the hospital?"

"yes, when I was six" He then went on to demonstrate how he broke his arm in the escalator. Apparently he just refused to let go and his arm went back around with the railing. I am still not exactly sure - I want a pic. I asked him what his mom said: "you're a bad boy!" I am not sure if he was wondering why I was laughing so much at his "I broke my arm" story. I hope not.

And finally, getting a fortysomething year old guy to tell me about his first love. He was in 3rd grade at the time. "She was 9."
What did he like about her? "She was beautiful."

All in a day's work.

Yesterday's quote, from the "let's buy a pet" lesson. "We have to keep someone in a cage." :)

Resumes

I remember when I was trying to type up a good resume. I was looking at all these online examples and they were all so stupid. I just stumbled across some real resumes on a work wanted type site If someone has "experience with Word," does that make them more qualified for anything? Isn't that a given? Aren't resumes usually created with Word?

Maybe the real key to getting a good job is letting your employer know that you can read. People never put this on their resume. The HR dept won't assume anything (especially if you're from the UofM). Who wants to hire people that can't read? Haha. (Insert joke about Kate's job here).... ok ok, mine too.

Another day....another day

Today I was trying to get a guy to understand the phrase: you/you've lost me. He understood it. But what he couldn't understand was why no one ever says "I lost me." You lost me/I lost me. Now I am confused as to why nobody ever says it. Yay, I just lost me!

According to my transcript, I went to UMD

- - - - - Beginning of Undergraduate Record - - - - -
Fall Semester 1999
University of Minnesota, Duluth
College of Sci & Engineering
Undecided Pre-Major
Attempted Earned
ART 1001 Art Today 3.00 3.00 B-
ECON 1023 Prin Econ: Micro 3.00 3.00 B-
MATH 1160 Finite, Intro Calc 5.00 5.00 D+
PE 1402 Tennis 1.00 1.00 A-
SBE 1101 Bus Environment 3.00 3.00 C
TERM GPA : 2.156 TERM TOTALS : 15.00 15.00


Everything about this is strange. My grades were horrible. Engineering? I guess to be fair, by blaming my grades on my high school, I must also give credit where it's due. Yes, that's LPGE tennis representin! ha.

Seriously, seeing the beginning of my transcript does bring back memories...of all the things I used to do instead of going to class...the homework and reading assignments that I didn't do. And it's a painful reminder of how sometimes not doing a thing will quite possibly result in...nothing. It puts in perspective how much I've changed during the past 6 years. If Senior Mark (5th year!) would have seen Freshman Mark he would have laughed and thanked the Lord for people like him...because they made him feel smart. This is one of those blogs that I might regret putting up later.

Keeping em quiet

McRae, what exactly do you do for an elementary education major? Do they have like a...wasting time class? Where they teach you different tips and techniques to make it to the bell? I am slowly learning stuff as I go. I imagine normal teachers have a book or something, so if you have any good ones let me know. My new favorite trick is to make sure that before the kids start coloring that they all have very sharp colored pencils. While this could be dangerous, coloring with crayons is just too fast. Colored pencils (sharp ones) extend the coloring session an extra five minutes. And if you point out all the little spots they missed, that's an extra five minutes. So if you have any tips on dragging stuff on, just leave them in the comment box. Of course - serious answers only!

Nara candles

Nara candles
Originally uploaded by terw0015.

Went to some festival in Nara. There were candles everywhere. Honoring the dead(I accidentally kicked over 2 candles). Saw a big dog, some temples, and some deer. Nothing too special is coming to mind. I bet mike blogs about this even though he would be breaking the "only one person can blog about each event" rule. And then he will say he didnt see mine.

Old school

Back to a Japan related blog. Two more quotes, both from the same lesson. It was the "I'm the doc, you're the patient" lesson. I had themcome up with their own problems. There were only two students in the class and they both had some killer lines. I started them off by saying something like "so what seems to be the problem?"

Guy #1 "I have a hangover. And I drank a bottle of medicine to cheer me up."
I cracked up.

Guy #2 "I broke my legs"
Me "when did this happen?"
Guy #2 "yesterday"

Again, I was laughing.

And today I had to play Uno again. Yes, I get paid to play Uno. One day this guy is going to win. I modified the rules on my side. I am no longer allowed to change the color by playing the same number - but I can still use wilds. The result of this was the longest unfinished game of Uno that I have ever played. Highlights were my student playing the wild card and then "changing" the color to the color that it already was - twice. And, playing the wild card and changing the color to a color that he didn't have - twice.

Holy Cats!

Well here is one for you Kate, I got it from the Strib:

"Study deems the Twin Cities liberal"

Twin cities? Liberal?

Deem:
To have as an opinion; judge.
To regard as; consider.

I didn't read the article. I just hope the study was funded by private donations.

Donuts aren't just for cops

Kate, your blog reminded me of my own donut story. Back in the warehouse days I used to work pretty long hours sometimes. And those days when the shifts reached the 14-16 hour mark - we would get donuts. It was always so nice to feel that our hardwork and long hours didn't go unnoticed. And they were always the good kind. I guess they weren't donut donuts, but rather rolls, with custard, twists, all that junk. The stuff fat rich people buy - as opposed to poor fat people. Well, it turned out that there was no benevolent manager. It was actually a co-worker!! How thoughtful. It would be difficult for someone to bring in 50 rolls once a week, especially on warehouse worker dollars, but he managed to do it.

Well, only a country bumkin like myself would assume that some poor fellow went out of his way to make others happy - especially at a Minneapolis warehouse. The reason we only got the donuts when we worked long hours was because it wasn't until around 5am that the neighboring gas station got their shipment and my sly coworker would go swipe a box from the truck. So yes, they were stolen, but they were still good. He did this for quite a few weeks and we all loved it...

But, all good things must come to an end. The police took his car (or his license, can't remember). Anyway, he couldn't drive.

So to make a long story short. If you are ever dropping someone off at the hospital who is suffering from multiple gunshot wounds - don't just roll them out of the car onto the sidewalk and take off. It's illegal. I am not sure why. I don't make the laws. But when the police take your car, it may be your co-workers that suffer the most. Who cares if he was "whinnin like a little baby" or "it was just a little 22." The sidewalk is for bums, not your bleeding accomplice.

Typical

A copy and paste from CNN. Found it funny...not sure why.

When asked if that was a threat of possible retaliation, Rumsfeld replied, "I don't imply threats."

Kamikochi

Originally uploaded by terw0015.

She was working on her flowers when I asked her how to get to the temple. She started pointing in every different direction and went inside. I could hear her washing her hands. I was about 90% sure that she said "just a minute." But my Japanese sucks. So I said "thank you" and started walking off. Then she said it again and came out with a tomato sliced in two and her cane. She gave me the tomato and started walking me down the street. She was very Yoda like, she had the size, the cane, and I am sure she had the wisdom too. I don't like tomatoes, but I forced myself to eat it. When I took too long of a break she would point to it as if to remind me it was still in my hand. Then I would take another bite and use my smile to reassure her that her tomatoes were excellent. She kept talking to me as if I understood Japanese, maybe because I kept nodding my head like I understood Japanese. The tomato had left its nasty residue all over my hand - nothing like ketchup or tomato soup either. I managed to choke down half of the tomato. We arrived at the temple, she turned around and waddled back. I chucked the other half of the tomato into the temple bushes. I like things with tomatoes in them, just not straight tomatoes. After the whole experience I went camping and had the typical non-blogworthy camping experience. Here's a pic.

Rant

Every now and then one of those websites pops up that is just annoying – even worse than mine! http://www.werenotafraid.com/ Two things about this site, not only is the entire thing ridiculous, but they have bracelets for sale! Enough with the stupid rubbery bracelets. Stop it! They are OK if they are the Lance Armstrong Live Strong or whatever bracelets, because those are the originals – as far as I know anyway. But all the other “let’s sell some bracelets” groups need to stop.

So the idea of this website – as reported on by the ever so popular Strib – is that people send in pictures of themselves holding up signs or with a printed text that says “were not afraid.” It is of course a message to the terrorists. Is there some secret tape somewhere of Osama or some other terrorist guy discussing their plans to scare the entire world? Where did this whole scare thing come from? I remember something about “shock and awe.” That sounds like it might have been scary. If they wanted to scare us, they would write a book like Stephen King – he gets paid for it. Or they could dress up like gremlins and go around asking for candy. While I have no direct (or even indirect – I hope) connections to any Middle Eastern terrorist groups, I am pretty sure that the bombs in London were not meant to scare people. My best guess is that they were meant to kill people – hence the trains during rush hour etc. And these websites with all these people holding up their stupid signs just weird me out. Do they feel like they are really brave because they “are not scared.” What are they trying to do? Show the world that as they sit inside of their country home, in front of their webcam that they aren’t scared? What do they have to be scared of – an audit, a computer virus,Count Chocula? Who knows. I am sure if the average Iraqi citizen had internet they would all get a good laugh. Either way, this rant has gone on long enough. Since blowing the crap out of their homes and neighboring cities doesn’t seem to deter anything, I guess there is nothing wrong with thousands of people taking pictures of themselves and putting them on a website – that should do the trick…too bad they didn’t think of that a few hundred billion dollars ago. Anyway, the site would be a lot cooler if you could rate each picture. Then you would have to have the option of looking at the highest rated pictures for each gender…just a suggestion. Oh, and you should be able to send them private messages of course.

Japanese Poetry

If you don't live in Japan, you have no idea. But the Japanese English is great. Many Westerners laugh at its strange Mad Lib style grammar and word selection. But I have come to appreciate the true beauty of what I call Japanese Poetry. Anyone can do it. All you really need is a marker, a tshirt, and a dictionary. I can not quote any off the top of my head, but I have decided that I should get into the shirt making business. My shirts would say things like:

The loving breeze flown into his hair, but his thoughts were on it.
The beautiful dance did not assist the injury.
The life lost was a sweet harmony to all.
Crying was scared to sing beauty.
Lovers never eat raw distaste
The poor man felt for your soul, but it was gone like the aura of silence.

That was like 30 seconds of randomness, but im serious, these would be best sellers. Feel free to enter your own ideas (but I may steal them)

ps. shoplifting thoughts was he did it best to win the game of blog.

ha! beat that.

I moved house

Normally I would never say "I moved house." Is that even normal? But according to our textbooks it's OK and I now teach Japanese people to say this. When they ask me about the grammar I just say its Aussie English. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. Either way, I now live in a different apartment. I got wireless internet today and it works - and mike - I didn't even have to restart my computer. HAHA. It's too late for me to think now. I will give you the mark update later.

bye

In other news, I left my suitcase on the train today. haha

Sometimes one small thing can put everything in perspective. So today at work I thought of the coolest joke. It goes something like this: what are the 21st and 18th letters of the alphabet? Answer: You Are! ahahhahaha. At the time it seemed really funny. Sometimes when really boring people tell you about their really boring job (like I a doing now) while using a really monotonous voice, things like my joke can seem really funny. Either that or I have the lamest sense of humor in the world. Either way, that's the kind of stuff I think of while I work.

In other news, Kate, those postcards were pretty good. http://postsecret.blogspot.com The sad thing is that they remind me of my life. Since I read them 24 hours ago I have had two different encounters that just made me want to write up a special postcard! The first one would say something like this:

Today I saw a crazy homeless man feeding the birds. He was having so much fun. I couldn't help but think how sad it was that this is probably the most fun he has had in weeks. It was the coolest thing I saw all day.

and

This one girl I teach will cry if I call on her. Now I just wait until I see her eyes tearing up and then I call on someone else. As soon as her eyes dry up, I call on her again. I do this the entire lesson - it makes me feel good about myself.

Head shoulders knees and toes, knees and toes.

I had my first kid’s class yesterday. It didn’t go too bad. It’s amazing how smooth things can seem when no one is watching. Teaching kids was when I realized how nice it is to be working for an English teaching company that doesn’t care about the actual learning part – just the money. Apparently sometime during the last few months I was kids trained. I don’t remember any of that. I do remember a nice girl singing and dancing, but that’s all.

So, to sum up my group of kids, I basically just sat there saying things like “is he walking” or something. And ideally they would say “yes” or “no.” Even better, they would say, “he is walking.” But that did not happen. Pointing to a picture I asked “is he walking?” I am sure they would have replied if they were not so busy entertaining themselves. One girl did sit there and appear to be listening. But even if she was it would have been difficult due to the screaming from the one dude as he did laps around the room while twirling his shirt over his head. The other kid was having fun squeezing his own butt cheeks and making farting noises with his mouth. I actually kind of liked “teaching” these kids. It was entertaining. The only thing I am dreading is that someday I am going to have to do it while someone observes me. I imagine I will be about ready to quit by then anyway.

Also, a poem from my friend Margaret (i think the "mark" she refers to may be me):
mark my friend is bored in japan, needs to get out and see more of the land, beautiful and abundant as it may be, mark doesnt realise there is much more to see, his eyes already fixed on the road ahead, without stopping to indulge on the path that led, time will fly and he eventually will see, what a wonderful experience japan can be.

Bin Laden location: CIA confident

According to CNN. And if you ask them (or read the article) it probably says "according to the CIA." Either way, how come every 2-3 months the CIA says they know exactly where he is. Why don't they go arrest him or something? Is that in the plan? Are we waiting for him to invite us over?

Of course I did not actually read the article. But I can only guess as to why they know where he is but don't do anything about it. Isn't the US fighting a war because of him or something? I don't really know - I'm in Japan. Well, anyway, I am trying to guess what the reasons are that CNN lists in its article. Here is my list, feel free to add yours to the comment section. Don't forget the napoleonisms afterwards. And no reading the article, that's cheating!

1. The NBA playoffs - aghh
2. He is on the other side of the world. geez.
3. The war on terror used up all our arresting funds. gosh!
4. We got Saddam, what do we want Osama for! uhhhh
5. If the CIA arrested everyone they had info on they would arrest everyone.
6. Osama and the CIA are tight. Whaddaya think!



OK, I realize this article didn't really have anything to do with Japan, but there is nothing on my mind and I didn't want to go an entire month without updating this worthless piece of internet space. Visiondirect sucks.

Mark

my knees suck

Jiu jitsu. My knee said "pop!" I said "what?" And it didn't reply. I guess that's a good thing. I had my other knee pop about two weeks ago. Two weeks of inconvenience but it feels fine now. I am thinking worse case scenario it's just another ligament tear. Maybe not even that. I'll see how it feels tomorrow. Maybe I will luck out and the pop was just cartiledge and the pain is just my imagination (it's not that bad).